The truth is, no one can teach you how to overcome grief. They will try to tell you to be strong and to go on. They end up just making you feel worse, because when you loose someone you will really feel bad and the hardest thing is to be strong. I just want to share my experience and hope that you are going to know that you are not the only one having difficulties with overcoming grief after you loose someone you love.
It’s been a year since my father died. After he was diagnosed we knew that it won’t be too long before he will be gone. And yet, until the last minute I prayed for him to live a little, just a little longer.
Face the reality! Once you know that it is over, the sooner you believe that the loved person is really gone the better is for you. In the beginning I just refused to believe that my father died. I didn’t want to eat, to drink, and I even didn’t want to live. But I had no choice.
Mood switching. In the beginning I thought that I will never overcome the grief I was feeling. After some time passed I was switching between two feelings. If I was feeling better, I felt guilty for feeling better. If I felt bad, I wanted to feel better. You have to go on with your life. You cannot live in the past.
Feeling weak! It’s hard to go on and to be strong. I had to stay strong for my family, trying not to hurt them. I had to be strong and go on, live my life. Sometimes all I wanted to do was just break down and cry. I wanted to tell everyone that I was missing my father, I was feeling weak. I wanted to tell everyone that it is very hard. But I couldn’t. I just want you to know that it is OK to feel weak.
Friends and family. Sometimes I needed someone to talk to. It’s hard to talk to someone that loves you and cares for you, because they will also be hurt when they know the way that you feel inside. I thank God that my father left a big family. They were always with me, as I am the youngest child. I also thank my friends for being with me when I was in need.
Feeling better. I thought that after some time passes I will feel better. It’s been a year and the truth is that I am feeling better. I know that he would want me to go on. I go back in time… I think of the past…all the good memories that he left. I will never forget his advice. I will never ever forget him. I think of my father everyday: what would he do, what would he say… I ask myself would he be proud of me? I know he would!